New Chapter


“Maybe in another life I’d’v been a political analysis ” then I laughed, raised up my glass .. and left .

My whole life been in and out of politics , going in circles about who’s right and who’s wrong, mocking the ones who sit on the other side of the table , trying to turn it around but it always ends up on my head. here, I am a total Palestinian.

“But in this life, I just want to find peace.. i actually want a lot of things but mostly peace” that’s what i wanted to say, but i couldn’t .

Most of my childhood was perfect, Disney movies, birthday’s one the beach, straight A student, and the best of all I was daddy’s lil princess. then i started to grow up . we all know how it is to grow up, reality hits you in your stomach it hurts so bad that you want to vomit your soul out .

But what Most of you don’t know is how to grow up As a Palestinian, in a little town called Gaza . Even dreaming is a battle here . i keep watching those Hollywood/Americano movies and they keep saying the sky is the limit . I close my eyes, i actually can feel myself flying, touching those clouds so soft like my grandma’s hands, and the sky so  blue i can almost forget yesterday . then Boom, another explosion near by, a reminder why ! A statement in my life to not forget that Israel is the limit .

“She broke his heart, then went out side to smoke another cigarette ” i wrote that the other day on my note-book, then scratched it before anybody could see it .

I was lucky enough to be raised up by my parents who fell in love then got married. i wanted to be like them so bad that i kept looking for love in every corner . then i found out that love was never born in this little town .

Love is forbidden . Love is evil . the only Love you are allowed to have is the Love for your country, then you grow up and your eyes get wider and you find out the ones who you thought Loves this country the most are the ones who betrayed her the most . you get chocked then heart broken , then you realize how its much easier to not care .

“Light that candle sweetheart, the night is so long ” i keep singing every-time the electricity is out . 

The best solution is to cut the electricity from the whole world for one week . then maybe we can all find our humanity again .

Electricity is so important that we can’t stand waiting in the line for bread without WiFi . in another case for the out side world waiting in the line for a Starbucks coffee .

I light up the candle at night because I want to see how painful love could be, the wax keeps melting and the fire keeps eating it so beautifully just like our love for our country . I am not afraid from the dark, i just found a way to watch my pain .








Who did you lose because air strikes by Israeli attacks?

How much pain you felt because of losing your beloved ones?

Why would you dry your tears in silence when you can shout out?

Why to suffer like this? When your right as human is to live in peace and be safe?



you will enjoy,too :

from the heart <3


first time i worked as a volunteer who’ve been actually  trained for the work was at Tamer institute .. as a book discuss ..

thats my first check , which i didn’t expect at all . i kept it as a memo ..

the funny story < as they call it >  is, the institute called me on the phone after a very long period , before the end of the last year . worried and asking me : why didn’t you get the check paid !!  Nalan : i kept it as a memo !   they spread the story as if  its something to laugh about ! when i came to seal the deal with the bank and the institute , signing papers that i won’t demand anyone for the money . they didn’t believe it . i meant it when i said : it means to me more than just work .

kids are angels , the chance to read books with them and discuss it . getting into their world . is not work. its love through another way. Palestinian kids are different than the kids in movies or basically in any other country, they’ve been through hell.  No one would not get burned from fire ! right ! but the burns in these kids lives is way deeper than it sounds . far reaching impact.

the check wasn’t just a paper with some numbers on . it was a prove to me before anybody else . i can do something for more than just myself . i can act responsible towards my people . i can help .

“i’m not saying i’m gonna change the world, but i guarantee that i will spark the brain that will change the world” 2pac

other times with other kids at the memory of Gaza war that happened two years ago , with NZRA .. hopefully the coming ones even much effective and coming soon ..